Bringing God’s Healing & Restoration

to Christian Marriages in China

Dear Friend,

Love. Understanding. Open communications. Compassion and mutual support. All these are essential ingredients of a healthy Christian marriage that reflects the loving heart of God. Everyone deserves to experience these qualities in their marriage. And every child needs opportunities to enjoy the love and presence of both of their parents.

But I know Christian men and women in China desperately short of love, open communication and mutual support in their marriages. These men and women are amongst thousands who are struggling to keep their marriages together or heading fast for divorce. And they need our prayers and practical help through DPM’s marriage resources.

According to statistics released in 2005 by the Ministry of Civil Affairs, 1.6 million couples divorced in 2004. This is almost 300,000 more than the previous year. And although the overall divorce rate is still lower than in Europe or the US, the long-term trend is upwards. The consequences of divorce are often devastating for those involved.

What are the reasons for marital breakdown in China?

The main reason for marital breakdown and divorce amongst Chinese Christians is very simple. Hundreds of thousands of Chinese believers do not know God’s design and principles of marriage because they have never received any teaching on the Biblical principles of marriage or on how to handle family crises.

Here is what a Christian sister from eastern China wrote to us recently: “Me and a few other Christian sisters who are facing marital problems sometimes get together to support one another. We hope that we can receive some training so we can help ourselves and other people, since many sisters in the church are facing pressure from non-Christian husbands.”

Through our DPM website, another lady shared about feeling frustrated with her husband who did not seem to know how to love their only son. Her frustration turned to anger and she even thought about divorce.

However, after browsing our Chinese website she requested some of our books on marriage and family life. We responded quickly and a few weeks later she wrote to let us know that after reading Derek’s books she set out to restore her relationship with her husband.

A second reason is that Christian women married to non-believers are often ill-equipped to live an honourable life for Christ.

Because of the unequal numbers of male and female Christians in mainland China, many women end up marrying a non-believer due to family pressure. This leads to a lot of marital problems. Many non-believing husbands complain that their wives spend too much time serving in church and neglect the family; some even abuse their wives because of this.

The fact of the matter is that Christian wives are facing tremendous physical and spiritual challenges. And they have no access to biblically based resources to help them understand and apply God’s principles on marriage and family life to their particular situations.

Thirdly, there are the relentless pressures - spiritual, ministry, and persecution – which make it difficult for pastors, church workers and evangelists to invest time and energy in their marriages.

Recently, I spoke to a young leader from a large house church who married the pastor’s daughter. Only four months into his marriage, he was struggling to make sense of it all and didn’t know what he had got himself into. His wife was pregnant and he felt that he was being slowed down in his ministry!

This leader’s perspective of marriage sums up that of hundreds of others - who tend to view marriage as a burden to their ministry - and often leave their wives and family behind and travel to share the Gospel.

On one occasion, when a pastor’s marriage was at stake and church elders were facilitating the reconciliation between him and his wife, she walked out saying ‘What about the lost years of our marriage?’

Although these testimonies are heart-breaking, the good news is that things don’t have to be this way

You and I can do something about helping Christians in China to build strong marriages. One way of doing this is by providing them with sound biblical teaching on marriage and family issues.

That’s why I am so excited to let you know that here at DPM we have an opportunity right now to bring God’s healing and restoration to Christian marriages across China!

Our aim is to print and distribute 100,000 copies of ‘Husbands and Fathers’ and ‘The Marriage Covenant.’ Also we will be making available 50,000 copies of ‘Husbands and Fathers’ in a two CD set. In addition to these resources, we are also planning to print 50,000 copies of ‘God is a Matchmaker’ which has gone through final proofing and layout.

Think of it – over 200,000 lives could be touched and marriages transformed through books and CDs on God’s design and principles of marriage. And given the fact that one book is read by or a CD is listened to by at least five people, the impact of these resources could be much greater indeed!

Imagine the difference your gift could make to Christians struggling to be salt and light in

China today

Picture a pastor learning for the first time that marriage is not a burden to his ministry but God’s blessing on his life. Imagine Christian sisters learning and praying together to overcome crises in their marriages. Consider husbands and wives using DPM books and CDs to learn and apply God’s principles of marriage in their own situations.

DPM’s resources on marriage and family life could impact the divorce trends in China and even introduce different generations of people to Jesus Christ. We receive many requests for these resources.

For as little as £30 you could be equipping at least 150 believers to rebuild or strengthen their marriages. With a gift of £60 or £120 you could be impacting whole Christian communities through books or CDs. And they in turn will share what they have learned with others in their churches and families.

I have enclosed a response form with this letter in the hope of hearing from you soon. So please take just a moment right now to fill it in and send your contribution towards our joint ministry in China.

God has placed this opportunity before us to equip and resource believers with much needed biblical teaching on marriage and family life. Let’s do everything possible to put books and CDs in the hands of church leaders and Christians across China while the doors for printing and distributing materials are open.

Thank you for uniting in strengthening fellow believers in China through your prayers and financial gifts.

With warm greetings,
Ross Paterson
Director DPM China

PS. Would you prayerfully consider a generous contribution today? A pastor and a brother or sister in Christ is waiting.